15 July, 2016

Day 5: Loving Yourself, Even When It's Hard

Boom! You just made it to day 5! Did you find sometime for yourself? Are you planning some? YAY!

Loving yourself is easy, when life is easy. When money isn't an issue, your marriage is fine and it's not bikini season. So how do you love yourself when things get hard.

Cut yourself a break, the biggest hindrance to truly loving yourself is not forgiving yourself for whatever you did that you don't like. Maybe it's something from the past, or that donut you ate. Whatever it is, find a way to forgive yourself. You are human, and while denying yourself a donut every other day may be easy, on a bad day, it isn't always.

In fact I encourage you on the bad days to be kid-gloved with yourself. Indulge in a few things that make you happy. Go see a movie, paint your nails, eat at your favorite restaurant.

My therapist loves to do this to me. If I had a child or a friend that was having a bad day or week or month, what would I do to show them some extra love. Probably grab a movie, bring some makeup or nail polish to their house with their favorite fast food and show them some love. If that's what you would do for a friend, why don't you do it for yourself.

Also, a good important to bring up, some days are just hard because of something no one can help. Some days your hormones fluctuate and you just feel more down, jittery or angry, that's just the human body for you. As I'm writing this, I'm having what I call a funk day. I'm just in a funk, it means I spend more time with myself, Mr. Bear knows to be gentle with me, spend more time with me and show me he loves me more. It's hormone fluctuation, I can't help it, and I can't explain it. In a few days I'll be back to normal, so just ride the wave until you're on the other side.

Look inward, in addition to spending some extra time with yourself, figure out what's really underneath. My funk right now was brought on by some drama, and some extra stress. Because I know that, I know to pull myself further away from it. Sometimes you have to break away, even temporarily so you can get clarity of mind.

Look at yourself lovingly, on the days where your body is not as beautiful, or maybe something was said to you about it, please go over your list of 10 things you like about yourself. If you wrote nothing down about your body, make a list for your body. Name little things, like that one freckle you like. Anything that reminds you that your body is beautiful.

Look in the mirror at yourself, and tell yourself how much you love that person standing there. Recite your list to her, tell her what you love the most. Promise to love her more, to cut her a break, to nurture her soul, to take better care of her body and mind.

Loving yourself is hard, especially on bad days. But it's also radical, life changing and liberating. Don't lose the path to self-love because it's foggy. Stop along the path, look around, wait it out, trust yourself.

This maybe a short journey, it could be long, but keep trekking, keep working it. At the end of it, you won't hate the less awesome parts of your body, you'll see yourself in a forgiving and loving light and you'll realize what kind of love you deserve.

So many woman are surrounded by people who do not see the beauty of who they are. They tear down the beautiful parts, and try to fill them with nasty, horrible words and thoughts. Love yourself, it will truly change your life.

If at any point in your journey, you need someone to talk to, someone to reach out, I'm here. Reach out to me in any way.

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